The Busy Mom - Is it Your Choice?

by Lori Radun, CEC

Let's face it. We live in a fast paced world. As moms, it is
hard to keep up with everything on our plates. We have piles of
laundry, piles of dishes, and piles of school papers. Along with
the many errands we have to run, we also play chauffer for our
children. It may be martial arts on Monday, soccer practice on
Tuesday and music lessons on Wednesday. Weekends may be even
worse with baseball games, gymnastics meets or ballet lessons.
And it doesn't end there. Many of us also try to squeeze in time
to volunteer at school and church because we know they need
help.

When life is too busy, stress increases and adrenaline levels
rise. Eventually, our bodies begin to tell us we are in trouble.
Common problems of an over-stressed lifestyle include physical
illness, disease, anxiety and depression. Our bodies can handle
only so much before they scream STOP! Relationships may also
suffer, as everyone becomes tired and irritable. Children, who
are over extended, may not be able to communicate their stress
in words, but tantrums, fighting and other unacceptable behavior
may all be warning signs.

People who try to handle too much often become disorganized and
forgetful. (Have you ever searched everywhere for something you
just saw yesterday? Or remembered an appointment - three days
late?) My husband and I are perfect examples. I was scheduled to
attend a teleclass on Monday: on Wednesday it dawned on me that
I had forgotten all about it. Last week my husband returned home
twice after leaving for work. The first day he forgot his
briefcase; the next day, he forgot his samples. Today he forgot
his suit jacket. It really is a vicious circle. Every time we
have to take time to return home or worry about things we have
forgotten, stress levels increase even more.

For many of us, volunteering becomes a time-stealing trap. Don't
hear me wrong. Volunteering is a great thing. Our world needs
volunteers, and volunteering is very rewarding. It is also our
responsibility to teach our children the importance of community
service. But moms overwhelmed with volunteer work may be over
scheduling themselves at the expense of their families and
themselves. When people identify a kindhearted person, who likes
to help, they may take advantage. It is easier to approach that
type of person than one who is never willing to volunteer.
Volunteering is important, but keeping our lives balanced is
more important. Expect others to do their share, but when they
do not, do not step in for them. Knowing when to say no is as
important as knowing when to say yes.

How wonderful it would be to have a magical machine with the
ability to create peace in the midst of chaos. With this machine
life would be slower and we would feel like we have all the time
in the world. If I had this machine I know what my life might
look like: I wake up 15 minutes early every day to meditate and
pray. I have time to spend on laundry and housecleaning because
there is nothing on my schedule. My children have time to relax
and play because they have eliminated many of their
extracurricular activities. Each night my family sits down to
dinner together and shares the best parts of their day. One
night of the week is designated as family game night. Saturday
night is date night and the children enjoy their babysitter.
Everyone in the family is happier and less stressed. Real
connections with loved ones exist.

Is this a "Fantasy Island" that can never be reached? No it is
not. In fact, no magical machine is needed. We all have the
power to create any kind of life we want. We can transform our
stressful lives into more relaxed and enjoyable ones. We may
have to rearrange our priorities. We may have to make some hard
choices - eliminating some of the activities and
responsibilities we once believed were necessary. We may have to
develop new habits or change old attitudes. But it can be done.
Change is not always easy, but isn't a happier, less stressful
life worth it? Think about this: The lives we model today will
probably be the types of lives our children live as adults. We
do have a choice - choose wisely.

About the author:
Lori Radun, certified life coach for moms. To receive her FREE
monthly ezine and the FREE special report "155 Things Moms Can
Do to Raise Great Children", go to
http://www.true2youlifecoaching.com.